Apocalypse of Good Manners

(From the files of self editting. This still seems true 7 years later. So, what the hell, let's hit publish.)

If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.

My mother taught me this. It was really bad advice. It doesn't teach us anything about how to live in disagreement.


I think that this idea is starting to evolve. Essentially, it is what happens when people take the stand that rudeness is always bad, or as my mother used to say "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all."

The problem is, not everyone is playing by those rules. And then two things happen.

One, some people, with seriously dysfunctional self edit functions, say all sorts of crazy things. And since no one says, excuse me, you are totally wrong, it becomes part of truth.

Second, some people, with over functional self editing, refuse to say hey, these are the rules we are playing by and now you know and we can play by the same rules, or make up some new rules together, or go play in our separate corners, or whatever. When that happens, some people fall back to One, and others just go play in the corner either with deep sadness or with deep homicidal fantasies. Take your pick.