The more I read, the longer my perspective becomes. I used to think that things were always getting better and better - or worse and worse - but the thing that strikes me now is that things are getting same and same.
Diligence in the "little" indignities, the things we accept after fighting for so long, is where we must go if we are to stop having a police state, an economy build on black bodies as widgets, work as indentured servitude.
Where in our lives is the safe space, the space we can get big hugs and regroup and know we can come back to after a day in the fray? Why is comfort and dignity so constantly under siege. Where to go when the traditional places - family or church - are the places that are eating you the most?
Tuesday, December 2, 2014
Monday, December 1, 2014
"with Jesus"
When I die, do not say I am with Jesus now. If I have died in order to be with Jesus, then Jesus totally failed.
You know, I wrote that rant this morning before I even knew that Alice was dying and now, she is dead - she is not with Jesus knitting at the piano.
And I have one week to get all this irritation sorted out - or maybe just find my beta blockers, before the memorial - because Baptists don't have funerals? I don't even know.
But seriously, don't say it.
You know, I wrote that rant this morning before I even knew that Alice was dying and now, she is dead - she is not with Jesus knitting at the piano.
And I have one week to get all this irritation sorted out - or maybe just find my beta blockers, before the memorial - because Baptists don't have funerals? I don't even know.
But seriously, don't say it.
The resurrection starts yesterday
"For all I know there may be, in sone sense, personal survival after death, but that is not what the resurrection is, in esse, concerned with. Where confusion reigns and the distinction between resurrection and immortality is lost or suppressed, it is common to find people, frantic in their embrace of one or another versions of survival after death, rejecting life in this world, including, typically, the gift of their own lives. That is more than an escapist doctrine, feigning to justify withdrawal, default, or cowardice so far as life in this world is concerned; it issues in idolatry of death. And its denial of the efficacy of the resurrection of Jesus Christ is tantamount to blasphemy."
William Stringfellow, Simplicity of Faith, 1982, from Keeper of the Word
I was completely raised on the idea of personal survival after death. I was raised on the idea of literal mansions in a literal town with streets literally paved with gold.
I literally wondered who was going to clean the toilets. That is how much the afterlife was going to resemble this life. It was absolutely going to get revenge on every slight I ever experienced and every opportunity that failed to come my way. Even the ones I knew nothing about - God knew. God was going to make me a winner, if I just closed my eyes and took it in the here and now.
When I decided to stop taking it, I came up with this brilliant notion - the subject of my very first philosophy paper. This is the only life I know anything about so this is the life I have to live fully. I think the cliche is "a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush." So, I have been going about since I was 20 years old with a working ethic of having no regrets.
For the most part, I think I am doing a good job of this. I have done everything in my life as best I could with the best information and resources I had at the time and I have lived in the moment as much as possible. Not everything has been smooth - some things have been epic in their failure. But an epic failure is not a regret - not trying is a regret. Letting fear of failure win is a regret.
So it is that when I discovered this not even very original idea of resurrection being about this life, about heaven being this world transformed, it simply made perfect sense and from that point, I had far fewer difficulties in remaining a Christian, although it was a very different sort than I had started.
And what I have found is that there are lots of people who spout this theology, but their lives are played out in the field where the personal survives death. And that is no place to let go of fear or to make mistakes and apologize and get over it. Because at best I believe my essence is an intersection of inert matter and a miracle, and the miracle at best will merge back with the platonic idea of this miracle and get recycled like an aluminum can (no bottle deposit and cleaning but annihilation and whole new issue), well, I better get on with it. I can't wait for someone else to make it right later. I can't just put my head down and think - well, I didn't make it worse. Because if I play by the rules out of fear and don't speak out of a desire of an easier future, I have made it worse.
William Stringfellow, Simplicity of Faith, 1982, from Keeper of the Word
I was completely raised on the idea of personal survival after death. I was raised on the idea of literal mansions in a literal town with streets literally paved with gold.
I literally wondered who was going to clean the toilets. That is how much the afterlife was going to resemble this life. It was absolutely going to get revenge on every slight I ever experienced and every opportunity that failed to come my way. Even the ones I knew nothing about - God knew. God was going to make me a winner, if I just closed my eyes and took it in the here and now.
When I decided to stop taking it, I came up with this brilliant notion - the subject of my very first philosophy paper. This is the only life I know anything about so this is the life I have to live fully. I think the cliche is "a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush." So, I have been going about since I was 20 years old with a working ethic of having no regrets.
For the most part, I think I am doing a good job of this. I have done everything in my life as best I could with the best information and resources I had at the time and I have lived in the moment as much as possible. Not everything has been smooth - some things have been epic in their failure. But an epic failure is not a regret - not trying is a regret. Letting fear of failure win is a regret.
So it is that when I discovered this not even very original idea of resurrection being about this life, about heaven being this world transformed, it simply made perfect sense and from that point, I had far fewer difficulties in remaining a Christian, although it was a very different sort than I had started.
And what I have found is that there are lots of people who spout this theology, but their lives are played out in the field where the personal survives death. And that is no place to let go of fear or to make mistakes and apologize and get over it. Because at best I believe my essence is an intersection of inert matter and a miracle, and the miracle at best will merge back with the platonic idea of this miracle and get recycled like an aluminum can (no bottle deposit and cleaning but annihilation and whole new issue), well, I better get on with it. I can't wait for someone else to make it right later. I can't just put my head down and think - well, I didn't make it worse. Because if I play by the rules out of fear and don't speak out of a desire of an easier future, I have made it worse.
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