Day Twenty Seven

Went to see my therapist today, and the med check, so it was a full service kind of day.

Not going to change anything with the meds right now. I have another appointment in about a month to see where we are after I pick up my life again.

My therapist said something brilliant though. He said something like: people with social anxiety can be seduced by affirmation. I wrote it on a piece of paper, and of course, I can't find it. Whatever, exactly, he said, it was like opening a door. I've been spinning, trying to see a way forward, and only being able to wind up in a panic, only able to see the negative. Which makes perfect sense, since I have spent a lot of the last couple of years working on really specific bits of my social anxiety. And the fact is, I've worked my way beyond interview anxiety.

Shannon described it as confirmation bias, but it isn't quite like that. I don't know how exactly to describe it. Maybe it is, I don't know. But I know that I'm feeling unstuck, finally.

I still don't know what to do, but I don't feel like I can't do anything.